Home education and friends. There I've not said it. The S word.
I don't believe home schooled children have a problem with socialization – at least mine don't. In my experience, it's quite the reverse. State educated children of our acquaintance (whose parents insist on rolling out the old socialization chestnut before someone's got to the last syllable of 'home ed-u-ca- ti......' ) stand sullenly in corners and look at you as if you are an alien if, in your ignorance, you address them, having not been born in the same academic year as them. Clearly a huge social gaff.
But I am getting increasingly worried about 'friends'. Which is different.
I look back on my schooldays, and I look at well adjusted, pleasant 12 year olds of my acquaintance (I run a Guide Unit, I have a good selection to study) and I think ..... I loved my friends. They were how I practised being a grown up. They were really, really important to me .....
And my children, have no friends.
You can go to groups, but it doesn't WORK the same, does it? You're not confined against your will in the same space for eight hours a day with a common enemy! That's what friendship is really about, in the 'high school' years.
So on and on we ponder.
A home edding friend last night confessed to having made appointments to view local schools.
I'm beginning to wonder if I should be going with her.
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3 comments:
my kids don't really have any friends either and i often feel quite bad about it. don't think the answer is school for us though, more's the pity after the day I've had today.
Jo
Hello. I found your blog from Jo's.
I take your point about your schoolfriends being very important to you. I, on the other hand, didn't do very well at all friendship wise with the same bunch of people born in the same academic year as myself. You are the expert in your children, and a decision to put them into school isn't by any means irreversible if you do go down that route, but school definitely isn't a one size fits all friendship fix for children.
Plus there's a lot to be said for having children who can behave themselves socially and talk to adults. I've noticed a huge difference in my older three in the six short months they have been out of school.
Best Wishes, Hazel
I hope you and your family can find a way to make good friendships without the sacrifices that going to school would bring. Fortunately my sons have made good friends simply by being out and about in the community (so many more opportunities than if they were stuck in a classroom being told not to talk!!) Also I am fortunate in that my church is non-judgmental about home edding which means my kids are able to make proper friends there too ( I realise sadly, that this is not the case everywhere!) I too found your blog from Jo's.
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